Pre-loved

I recently bought a secondhand jumper to help keep me snuggly and warm this winter*. When I buy secondhand I usually try to pick items in good condition because I like my clothes to last me a long time. The very first thing I noticed about this particular jumper was a tear at the collar, and there were at least three other signs of wear or damage. And yet I couldn’t help but love it – the colour and fit were perfect for me!

Since bringing the top home, I’ve fallen even more in love. I’ve also discovered more signs of wear, including two places where the previous owner stitched up tears in the fabric. And you know what? Knowing that my new jumper has been heavily worn, loved and repaired by someone else makes it feel that much more special. Give me pre-loved over brand new any day!

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*Although it’s shaping up to be a very mild winter so far. Global warming much?

Galvanize Me

I’ve been feeling rather at odds with the world in the past couple of weeks. It’s like I’ve reached a tipping point and I’m just so fed up with all that is wrong with the world—the lack of female representation in the media and in my work environment;  the casual disowning by retiring baby-boomers of the myriad issues facing their children and grandchildren; the modern economic lens that frames every decision as ultimately selfish; the way so many people are locked into a consume-and-dispose mindset…

At the same time, I’m surrounded by events that roar with love—close friends getting engaged, another recently married, and the celebration of some big milestones in my own marriage.

And a part of me realises that this slow-burning fury can galvanize me into action, into living as though a better world is possible. After all, surely the point of anger is to help us protect ourselves and those we love most. So, in that spirit (and with an unapologetically cheesy wedding theme), here are a few things that have been inspiring me recently:

Something old: I’ve rediscovered the pop punk anthems of my teen years—and I still love them! I was amused (but somewhat disheartened) to find that the rebellious songs of my youth still feel so applicable, what with all the condescending advice older generations keep spitting in the local media.

Something new: I’ve started using instagram, and it’s bringing me a lot of joy. The combination of artful pictures and simple words packs a powerful punch. I’m even tempted to start posting my own photos, although I’ve always preferred to express myself using words rather than images.

Something borrowed: A wonderful blog post by Ryan Cope on Plastic-Free Tuesday highlights the gossamer-thin line between being either weighed down or motivated to keep fighting by the endless stream of plastic waste humanity is generating.

And some blues: Mahogany L. Browne’s poem, litany, captures some the essence of blues music, as well as some of my own recent feelings of frustration. I’ve written before about my love for blues dancing, but reading litany made me question whether I—as a privileged white woman from halfway around the world—have the right to seek and receive so much pleasure from a music style with deep roots in hardship and struggle. Perhaps the answer is to further educate myself about the history of blues while continuing to appreciate the music and the dance for the joy it brings me and others in my community. After all, it’s times like these we most need shared moments of joy to bring us together and remind us what’s most important in life.

“I don’t like who defined what authority sounds like. I reject it.”

As a young woman working in a male-dominated profession, I often come across (and even seek out) advice to be more confident, more assertive, more vocal; to stop phrasing statements as cautious suggestions; to stop apologising so damn much; to back myself; to lean in as Sheryl Sandberg put it.

This advice all sound sensible. How else will women get equal pay if we don’t demand higher salaries during pay negotiations? How else will women get our voices heard if we don’t speak up in meetings? How else will women get people to take us seriously if we don’t sound confident in our suggestions?

But I had an ‘aha’ moment when I spied these tweets by Marian Call* on my husband’s computer screen last night:

Reading Marian Call’s tweets, I realised all the sensible pieces of advice for women to be more assertive, confident, authoritative, are variations on one troubling theme: Women need to act more like men to get by in this world.

In hindsight, I’ve come across similar concepts before. For example, in Quiet: The Power of Introverts in a World That Can’t Stop Talking, Susan Cain encourages introverts to work with their strengths instead of trying to conform to the expectations of an extroverted world, and I found a strong parallel between this and the expectations on women in a man’s world — constantly being urged to speak up, make yourself heard, act assertively to make people like and listen to you.

So instead, I encourage you to reject a wholly masculine image of power. The world needs more authority figures who speak gently and with consideration for their fellow human beings. The world needs more men and women who embrace their feelings. The world needs more leaders who apologise when they have made a mistake. The world needs a new definition of what authority sounds like.


*For those who know me well, Marian Call wrote the song my husband and I danced to at our wedding:

April spring blossoms

As autumn started this year a blustery storm stripped our plum tree of its dying autumn leaves.

A few weeks later we started seeing new buds, white blossoms and fresh green leaves appearing… Our poor plum tree doesn’t know what season it is!

Plum tree blossoming in autumn

Plum tree blossoming in autumn

This autumn has been uncommonly warm, and while it’s tempting to point the finger at climate change, the blame probably rests with the El Niño weather pattern we’ve been having.

I just hope our plum tree has enough reserves left to survive the winter and blossom again next spring.

Choice! Putting the Power in Your Hands

Here in New Zealand, we’re lucky to generate 80% of our electricity from renewable sources like hydro, wind, solar and geothermal. Our main electricity source is hydro power, which is relatively easy to switch on and off at will and provides a stable baseline source (at least when the lakes are full). Wind power is also a significant source of renewable energy, but the amount of electricity generated varies greatly depending on current weather conditions and it can’t be stored. On the other hand, the 20% of electricity from non-renewable sources is primarily generated by burning fossil fuels.

As well as having a high overall proportion of renewable energy, some electricity “gentailers” (generator–retailers) in New Zealand produce electricity using 100% renewable energy sources. I used to think I could do my bit to reduce carbon emissions by signing up for power from one of these 100% renewable gentailers. But it turns out all the electricity being generated at a given point in time is fed into the grid and distributed throughout the country to where it’s needed, so the mix of electricity sources is the same for everyone, regardless of who your power company is. Continue reading

Things I learnt from city living

A year ago my husband and I were living in a small apartment in Auckland’s city centre. We only stayed there for six months before moving back out to suburbia, but I learned a lot during that time.

1. Small can be beautiful

My apartment had a floor area of just 31 m², including a mezzanine sleeping area with a rather low ceiling (only my shortest friends could stand up straight without hitting their heads). But the high ceiling and full-height windows in the main living area made the room feel much more spacious than many of the other tiny apartments we viewed while flat-hunting. Continue reading

Summer in the Garden

I’m spending my summer holiday at home. There’s no better time to enjoy the garden than a lazy summer day.